Problems and promises

Ok scrap the idea of the chair by the bedroom window to sit bathing in the sunshine while reading a novel, as today it is raining and it wasn't so warm and restful at all. My bed was though, but I have decided that unless I have had a bad night or I'm feeling ill, then I will get up and atom by 9am... ok more 9.30ish.
I did actually have a restless night though... well a weird one anyway, but I still got up on time. I woke up after about 3hrs sleep last night in exactly the same place as I was when I dropped off to sleep in the first place. This is very unusual for me, as I roll from side to side from ages as a rule to find a cool comfy spot. I then spent hour battling with myself after waking up to get up and have a pee, but I really couldn't be bothered even though I wanted to and it wasn't because I was warm and snug, because I was really quite chilly again.
I actually went off to sleep again without going to the loo, which I'm normally scared to do so, in case I dream that I am on the loo and actually pee the bed by mistake!

Picked my sick certificate for a month from the doctors, but if it takes longer to sort out my retirement, then the doctor said to call her and she'll write me out another one. That's good as I have been quite breathless this morning.
Got lured over to the hairdressers after the doctors, as my hair seems to have gone mad this time and looks pants. I now have very short hair again and once I've blow dried it myself, it will feel a lot better.
Drove into work afterwards to drop off my certificate and meet the new chaplain. Whoa going into work again was really weird as I think people were pleased to see me, but it's amazing how life goes on without you. I wasn't expecting to have people flinging theirselves at my feet, begging me to stay, but I wasn't prepared to feel guilty either at not staying that extra week. Not that anyone said anything, but I just felt a bit of a failure again. The Laerning Support girls have asked if we can have a regular weekly lunchdate which I liked the idea of. Old habits die hard as I was really tempted to help Sam as she was snowed under, but I know that is a no no and Jean sent Andrina out to help anyway.
The chaplain was really sweet and we spoke about everything and anything. I asked if he was seeing me because he knew something that I didn't, like I was about to snuff it and he was there to save my soul. Thankfully he said no, but if I did want someone to talk to he was always there. I actually think I could talk to him quite openly about my fears that I have about this transplant and I was quite impressed with him as he didn't run screaming through the door when I said I was worried about having a scumbag's heart and that it might change me into a scumbag.
I then took my pride off to the garage and admitted defeat with the mobile and the car's blue tooth connection problem and I was embrassed to say, the young lad did it in less then 10mins... the shame of it.

Lots of love Debbie x