Fighting dragons and guilt trips

Well whether it is psychosomatic or whether the tablets are already beginning to help I don't know, but what I do know is that the phlegm today is a lot looser, so there for coming off my chest easier, the headache although still there isn't as bad and the tiredness comes in waves. So a good call of judgement I hoping.
Probably I've not helped myself by the amount of walking I've done today, but I do feel as if thankfully the proverbial black cloud has lifted a wee bit from over my head.

I was going to sneak off to Hedingham Castle today without taking mother with me this morning. I knew she wouldn't make the walk up the very steep slope to castle. In fact I knew I wouldn't make it either, which is why Greta volunteered to come with me to push me in my wheelchair and very nearly put her own back out in the process. Thank goodness for strapping young men who come to rescue a couple of old damsels in a lot of distress!
I have taken mother to somewhere like that in the past when I could get about easier and I've left her watching something from the comfort of the car while I've done a whistle stop tour around the event. Not very satisfying for either of us and as my sister told me to be like her and to go off to places on a Sunday and stop feeling guilty, I decided to go without her but not tell her. Coward I know!
Besides Greta wouldn't be able to push both of us around and at £12 each for an entry charge, I did not want anyone to be the saddo left sitting in the car.

Anyway before I left, mother phoned and wanted me to come over and sit while she had a shower. Sounds easy peasey I hear people say, but nothing is that straight forward with my mother. Bless her she is a wobbly as Bambi on ice when she stands now, and me complete with oxygen pack on back, had to help dry her.
Now it's an understatement to say I'm not feeling my best at the moment, but she may have looked like Bambi, but I looked just like Nemo flapping about out of water by the time we had finished. I sat on the floor gasping for air and swearing under my breath wondering what the rest of my siblings are doing today.
'Oo I really can't go anywhere today dear,' mother said to me and I had to refrain from punching the air with my fist, 'so we'll go out tomorrow instead.'
Ok I can live with that and guilt cloud removed...Yay!

So I got to go to see the jousters battling each other in the grounds of the castle on their huge powerful horses.
I had a jolly scrummy rabbit burger, a bit of a modern twist on medieval meal, but then rabbits weren't introduced into England till a lot later anyway.
We also had some lovely homemade lemon juice and drank while watching the jester entertaining a lot of under three foot tall children all armed with swords. Have to admit there were quite a few youngsters there that I could see in counselling in years to come with anger issues. The way that the poor old jester was having jump about to save his knee caps was more than any jester should have to do on a sunny Sunday afternoon to earn a crust!
If you thought jousting with big pointy sticks was scary, believe me you'd rather face that then lots of hyped up four to six year olds any day, running towards you with swords slicing through the air!

I felt so much better in myself after my Sunday afternoon out with just Greta and me, that I went back and cooked mother's Sunday roast with a new improved demeanour. A win win situation I think the smart people would say!

Loys of love Debbie x